Good Morning, Captain Dumbass
by AndThatWasEnough
Summary: He never thought much of his real name... That is until, of course, he met her. One-shot.


**Author's Note: So, this has been sitting in my files for awhile. I guess you could call it an epic poem. Thought I'd give it a shot. It leads up to the beginning of 'Witnessing It.' But, you don't need to have read any of my other stuff to get this. But you're welcome to, of course.**

**Let's see how this goes.**

**Happy reading. :)**

* * *

With one last flourish of his black pen

He signed his name,

Col. Two-Bit Mathews Esquire the Third

And he laughed because it was a pretty damn fine joke

Or so he thought

Because his mother didn't really appreciate getting that letter from the principal

About how he refuses to comply

But he just shrugged because there wasn't much else they could do by this point

So he kept signing his name like that

Until he found someone worth giving his real name to

But he hadn't found that person yet

So he kept going

And when he walked by the old house he threw rocks at it

Because he has a good arm

Because the man from the house taught him how to use it

And they left that old house before the baby was born

And he left the new one a year after because

Well, no one really knows

But he left and that's what matters

Because nothing really is quite like it used to be anymore

And he signs his name

Col. Two-Bit Mathews Esquire the Third

Because he doesn't like the man's name

And he hasn't found someone worth giving it to yet

* * *

He likes how the preacher's daughter feels against his body

And he's fairly confident she likes how his feels too

And she keeps him from being so lonely when there isn't anything else to do

Or anyone else to listen

And she says,

"You're something, Two-Bit Mathews."

And he says,

"I know I am."

And she just smirks because that was the thing to do so she did it

And then continued to press herself against him and make herself known to his body

He's surprised

Very surprised

That a girl of God knows so much about spooning

Cause he thought that saintly girls didn't do that sort of thing

But apparently

They do

* * *

It kinda hurt

When the shards got stuck in there

And it hurt a lot more

When Darry had to pick them out

And it hurt the worst

When he stitched his battle wound,

Which he acquired in a bar fight,

And he's fairly proud of it

But he puts on a brave face

Because that's the thing to do

And Steve laughs as he squirms

"You're next, bud."

"No fucking shit, but I still get to enjoy the show."

So he flips him off,

But it doesn't shut him up

So he starts spewing information at him

About his evening

"You shoulda seen her! She was six foot five with muscles twice the size of Darry's, and more facial hair too I reckon. She stood back there beatin on some innocent bloke and being the brave soul I am, I stepped in and saved his ass, but not before receiving a few scars."

Steve glared

And he laughed

Because that was the thing to do

* * *

"My father knows."

He groans, putting his head in his hands

He knows

The dad does

The dad fucking knows

And that's never good

Because the dad is someone you do not fuck with

Especially when you're doing his daughter

"He can't know."

"But he does!"

"Naw. Naw, he can't."

"He does, Two-Bit! He knows! What're you plannin' on doing about it?"

Him?

Him?

He couldn't figure out how to fix this

Not ever

Not.

Ever.

He ain't wired for problem solving

It ain't in his genes

His old man made sure of that

"Don't know, Kath."

"When you figure it out, then you can come back."

He never told her about the name

* * *

He's tearing the edges of his paper

When he heard that voice for the first time

And he swears an angel has come down to earth

And he tries to remember Kathy

How when he figures it out he can go back

How they can go back to being them

But he can't resist this Raven

This Raven!

This girl!

He likes to call her that

When she walks by him on campus,

Most likely on accident,

And she rolls her eyes at the name,

Her friends too

But deep inside he thinks she likes it

And that this is the girl he'll tell

Tell her about the name

The name.

He'll give it to her

It's a big deal, but he knows it in his non-existent soul that this

This!

Is the one

* * *

That Pony

_Ran_

_Ran_

_Ran_

As fast as he could

Till he ran his lanky little legs to someplace else

Taking Johnny Cade along for the ride

And he knew about the fever when those legs brought him back

And his guilt complex kicks in once the kid hits the deck

And he cries into Darry's shoulder

And apologizes to Sodapop till the sun comes up

Because he's a bad buddy

And he feels they should know that

Even if they don't believe him

That night he goes home

And he thinks of the Raven

And how he's scared of how much he wants her, but knows how much better she'd make this situation

Because she's one smart cookie

With a body

A real

Body

He realizes how much he'll miss that little puppy dog of a boy and that delinquent

Because he's known them a long time

Not as long as Darry,

No,

But a long time

And that makes him cry

And he cries himself to sleep

And cries himself to sleep for several nights afterwards

* * *

She laughs at him because he's singing along to "Lay, Lady, Lay" in a spot-on impression of Bobby D.

She gets quiet when he gets to the climax

Because he means it

And she takes a step back

Far,

Far away

"You mean that?"

"I do."

Bridget is speechless, which isn't unusual for her, but this

This

Is a different kind of

Speechless.

"I meant it when I said it to you, ya know," she whispers. He notices the bit of red around the eyes

Even in the dark

And in her pink room

He realizes, too, that he means it

He does love her

And he still hasn't told her much about Kathy

Kathy doesn't know about the two of them.

But he doesn't care because Kathy never talked about what might happen after high school

Two-Bit didn't know if he was gonna marry the Raven

But he knew he could see it happening in his head and he knew she saw it too

* * *

It was when things got hard that he wanted them most

When he wanted to get into some good trouble with Dallas

When he wanted to play pinball with Johnny, who had once been the best in all of Tulsa

When he wanted to find Bridget Stevens and run away with her because sometimes, anywhere is better than

Here.

But then he and Ponyboy will go see a movie

Or Steve and Soda will laugh with him as they drive around town

Or he and Darry will go grab a beer, and it's just like before he graduated

all

over

again.

And he misses how it used to be, but he knows;

He knows,

Deep down in his non-existent soul,

That this is how things are now, and that they're better than they once were not so long ago.

And one night, in Bridget Stevens's pink bedroom,

They hear her father coming into the house.

"You need to get out of here!" She whispers urgently, in that thick eastern accent of hers.

But Two-Bit Mathews is calm.

He's calmer than he was when Kathy's dad found out.

Because now,

He has the chance to do it right.

"I'll go," he says.

He heads for the door quickly

The one that leads off her room and into the porch

And he's almost out the door when he

Stops.

"Bridget," he says. Bridget stands beside him.

"What?" She whispers, her eyes boring heavily into his.

He takes a deep breath

And braces himself

Because he can't believe it

And he says,

"The name's Keith."

* * *

"I've been thinkin, and I don't love you."

Two-Bit tells Kathy this two months before graduation,

And she can't believe it.

She can't believe him.

She can't believe Two-Bit Mathews doesn't love her

But

She's not sure exactly why he should.

So,

Instead,

She says, "I know."

Like she's known all along.

Because, really,

She has.

Kathy knows how he eyes the girl that moved to Tulsa,

The one with the black hair and the big green cow eyes and the

Living.

Opposite.

Of her.

And she's upset.

"I'm sorry," Two-Bit tells her.

He is.

He really is.

But he doesn't want to lie to either of them. Not anymore.

* * *

He spends the summer after he finally graduates in Bridget's blue convertible Beetle

And sometimes,

She lets him drive.

The wind blows through their hair,

And his is as unruly as hers,

Because greasing it is something no one does anymore.

He's let go of that part of himself, in a sense

Sure,

There are fights.

Good fights.

But she's worth more than a good fight.

So he lets long, rust-colored hair blow behind him,

the dust kicking up around them.

"I still love you," she'll tell him. And he'll nod and say,

"I believe you."

"Now you say it to me."

"I still love you."

It's almost like they're trying to convince each other of it, even though they know it's

True.

Maybe it's because they're scared.

They're young and scared.

Just like they're s'posed to be.

"I got a scholarship," she tells him one day, as they're walking through some park.

He looks at her.

"Yeah?" He asks. She nods.

"Yeah. For music, performing arts. Guess I really am good, huh?"

He's not exactly surprised.

He just knows that they're aren't any schools here she wants to go to

"So I guess that means you're leaving."

Two-Bit doesn't say it like a question.

He says it like he knows.

"Yeah, I am," she admits.

And he wants to scream.

But instead, he just rams his enclosed fist into a tree.

* * *

They spend her last days before she goes to NYC,

The Big Apple,

Having sex and driving around.

He wishes he could tell his friends more about it

How bad he's hurting

How it just won't be the same,

Just like it wasn't the same after his dad left

Or when Johnny and Dallas left

Or even when Mr. and Mrs. Curtis left

Left.

And she falls asleep on his chest, in her room.

The sun is slowly sinking and the sky is

Orange and

Red and

Pink.

And it's damp because it's rained.

The room is dark, and his chest is bare,

And it's a true southern night.

The cicadas are going full speed

And he's sticky and so is she

And he's considering grabbing a shower and calling it a night by seven-fifteen,

When he realizes that tomorrow is the last day she'll be here.

* * *

Poor, poor, Sodapop

His number came up too soon

It's not something you want as a birthday present,

Knowing you're going off to kill gooks, that is

Because that's about the time he got it

Not the day before

Not the day of

Two weeks later

But the infatuation with the fact-of being eighteen

Old enough to drive and vote,

But not legally to drink-

Still lingered

And the letter killed the party

What a Buzzkill!

So now he's standing on the front porch,

Just waiting for his.

And it's months later, close to Thanksgiving,

And he just isn't the same person as he was

At the end of August.

His little sister finally drags him in

And his mother makes him coffee,

which he takes with him as he walks away to the Curtis place

Which just isn't the same without Sodapop.

The buzz just isn't quite the same anymore.

But when he gets there,

There's Darry.

And there's Steve.

And there's Ponyboy.

And he grins at them as he comes in the front door

and they grin back.

They laugh

And they're smiling.

And someone hits his hip on the edge of the table.

It's Ponyboy.

"I'm okay!" He calls.

And Two-Bit knows that's true for

All of them.

* * *

He remembers

The morning she left.

He felt her shaking him, and heard her say,

"Good morning, Captain Dumbass."

He wasn't quite sure what she meant

Like maybe she was angry at him...?

But as he opened his eyes, he saw that she wasn't angry

She was just there

Bridget was just

There.

Smiling at him.

"G'morning," he had said back to her.

"My dad is wondering if you'd like to come with us to the bus station. To drop me off."

He thinks about it.

It's then that he realizes:

Her dad knows.

And he don't care

that Two-Bit Mathews loves his daughter.

He thinks about it

And thinks.

She looked real good then,

In the early-morning Southern sun

And she was already done up for the day

Looking real nice and ready for traveling.

Two-Bit remembered how she looked the night before,

How she was bathed in orange light and

Dusted in sweat and sweet talcum powder

And he realizes,

That's the way he wants to remember her.

He knows she'll be back in the winter,

But he wants his last image of her to be the combination

Of now-

-and then.

"I'm good," he told her. "I'll miss ya."

That's all he can manage. He clears his throat.

Bridget can manage more, though,

And she leans down

And kisses him.

When she looks at him,

Right in the eye,

She does look sad.

And she says, "I'll miss you, too. I still love you."

"I still love you, too."

He means it.

He really does.

And when he writes her,

He often signs his letters

'Two-Bit',

Or maybe even 'Captain Two-Bit Mathews.'

And then there's that one time,

When she writes him and tells him

How she does miss Tulsa,

How she was wrong a lot,

How she shoulda been good to him from the start,

How she wishes for his friends-all of them-to come home.

He thinks about it for awhile.

Thinks about the name.

About Kathy.

About Johnny and Dallas and

Running away

About hair grease and smokes and long drives

About beers with Darry.

And good times with Sodapop.

And late nights with Steve.

And traipsing around with Pony.

And he tells her that it's alright,

That he gets it,

That things will get better there,

That she's where she needs to be,

But that he'll always be here,

And plenty of others will be too,

And he signs it

'Keith.'

* * *

**AN: Pardon typos. Look for more updates from me, and, as always, thank you for reading. Reviews would be great. :)**


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